LYDIA
Lydia was dazed with confusion. “What the hell was happening?” She dialled Rumi again, but her phone was switched off. “Is she in trouble? Was she kidnapped? God! “I hope she has not been in an accident! She paced furiously across her living room, totally triggered, and confused. Another call came in five minutes later.
“Hey Bestie.” Rumi’s shrill voice resounded over the phone. Lydia almost collapsed from relief.
“What happened? You had me so worried. Why have you decided to give me a heart attack ehn” said Lydia with a growing anger.
“I’m sorry babe. I know you must have been worried sick about me” she said.
“Of course, I’ve been worried. I’ve not been able to think properly since yesternight. Where did you go?”[1]
“See ehn, don’t mind me. I waka one stupid waka yesterday and had a slight accident” she said.
Once again, Lydia was thrown into another panic frenzy.
“But don’t worry, I’m fine. It’s nothing serious. I’m at home now, come over let me give you gist.”
*********************
A still shaken but relieved Lydia got to Rumi’s house within the hour. She was angry but curious at the same time. She quickly caved into her curiosity by not scolding Rumi the way she had planned to. Turns out, Rumi had gone out with a guy she met recently at one of her fashion photo-shoots. A model like her with similar interests, and it therefore did not take long for them to get over the talking phase. He was everything she liked in a man. Fine, fine, and FINE!
Most of Rumi’s weaknesses could be summarised into ‘fine boys’. She appeared to lose every ability to reason clearly when around the ‘poisonous’ species. They agreed to go see a movie. She had arrived fifteen minutes earlier. Like Lydia, she detested being late for anything. She was wearing her tightest jeans (her curves were most expressive in them), and the exact message she wanted to pass across. She had light makeup on, wore her full lace wig and slipped her dark shades between the weaves. She knew she looked good.
Her date started off by being late and shabbily throwing in a flimsy excuse of an apology. She should have seen the signs and ran for dear life, but no! Fine boy! They agreed to watch the finale of the Marvel comics’ Franchise, Avengers: End game. Everyone had been talking about the death of Iron Man, she was not going to wait for any more spoilers. When they got to the ticket stand, she leaned back slightly to let him do his thing; pay for them both and silently admire him from behind. He was fine looking, whoosh! He wasn’t ripped like Elliot, her ex, but he was just as tall and with a great fashion sense. She was so focused on her intense perusal that she did not notice someone was fumbling between his wallet and pocket. She did not want to believe he was pulling this incredibly old and dumb trick on her until he said
“Babe, I think I…”
“Forgot your card at home? Or let me see, changed trousers at the last minute? Or someone picked your pocket in the bus? Or better still, an octopus fell from the sky and you were so smitten by its beauty, you gave it your ATM card!” She knew she was a bit extra but, she had seen it all and heard so many excuses she wasn’t going to take anymore. It was her fault for automatically thinking every fine boy was a gentleman. He was saying something in the line of “pay for us, I’ll transfer to you” but she was already on her way out. “No time for broke boys” she said to herself.
“What then happened?” asked Lydia.
“Relax now. you too like gist” said Rumi.
“Get to it already”
As she was leaving, he ran after her and apologised profusely. He was obviously embarrassed, and his explanation made sense. He had stopped to withdraw some money at the ATM and he forgot to retrieve his card after taking the money. She felt sad for him especially for embarrassing him that way and agreed to pay for the tickets, declining the refund when he offered to do a transfer.
“It’s the least I can do, for embarrassing you, I’m so sorry. It’s just that I’ve heard a lot of silly stories and I don’t want any part of it.” He accepted her apology and got popcorn and drinks. Since they missed the previous slot, they had to wait for the Eleven PM time slot.
“Now this is the interesting part Lydia” but Lydia was listening with rapt attention anyway.
“While we were watching the movie, he said he wanted to use the gents. At first I was like, who leaves to do anything in the middle of the most interesting movie ever? I did not pay attention to him as he left. Hmmm, 10 minutes later, he was not back, I thought maybe he was doing more than urinate, till 20 minutes and then 30 minutes passed. I decided to call him to say he was missing out and all, but I realised my phone battery was dead. When the movie ended and he wasn’t back, I was seriously worried and wondered what could have happened. Then a thought crossed my mind and I shook my head vigorously hoping it was false. I checked my bag for my purse and lo and behold…”
“Hell no!!!. he stole your purse?” Lydia shouted with absolute disbelief.
Not clear who is speaking…






































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